What Kind of Joke is this?
by dreaming-freak
Summary: The war is over but for some reason, Hermione finds herself face to face with no other than Tom Riddle himself! What is all this supposed to mean? TomxHermione


**A/N:** Well I'm a big fan of HGxTR….and I'm a big fan of slightly humorous fics…so of course I had to write a mix of that: ) Enjoy!

**Disclaimer:** Harry Potter is not mine.

**Honestly, what kind of joke ****is**** this?**

Little did she know it might be the last time she could see them.

Hermione woke up due to a rather unpleasant feeling on her arms. She got up to a sitting position, put her sleeves back down. The sleeves of her school uniform. Why was she sleeping in her robes? The realization hit her like a thunderbolt: she wasn't in her bed, she was in a forest. A very dark one. That was a good and a bad thing. It was good because no one would be able to see her horrific expression, which would be eyes rounder than golf balls, hair standing in every direction and an unusual paleness. However, the bad part was much worse, as no one _was _actually there and her wand was nowhere in sight.

"Relax, it's just a trick," she assured herself as she felt around the ground. She closed her eyes (thank God!) and went in small, measured circles around on her knees and outstretched arms. She did look pathetic, which would only balance the payback to whom even dared do this to her. A few moments later, after picking a few broken branches by mistake, she whispered out the obvious _lumos_ The light blinded her for an instant, so she took the opportunity to slowly rub her eyes. She looked at her wrist watch and sighed angrily. The young Granger then tried to even out her hair that strongly resembled a bush, and stomped to the school grounds. Her legs stopped dead in their tracks.

_Where_ exactly were the school grounds?

The brunette did a slow 360 degree turn. A single sight filled her eyes: the one of trees. Endless rows of black naked trees enrobed in a towel of mist. She stopped and listened. The sounds of the forest grew louder since Hermione's sleepy head had finally grasped the seriousness of the problem.

"Alright," she calmly told herself, holding back a persistent yawn. Her heartbeat greatly outnumbered the steps she was taking in the direction of a large tree. Silently yet not so silently, she commenced ascending it when suddenly a loud "Who's there?" made her lose her balance. She tripped (somehow…) forwards to get her wand, and shouted, at the same time as the other person, the spell that would make all clear. (_lumos_, that is)

Only, it made things a lot, LOT more complicated.

The dirt on her face combined with her tired look made her look like a refugee. That was the first thought that crossed the Head boy's mind when he spotted the noisy intruder's confused expression. A few silent seconds passed before the boy asked again, "Why aren't you in the dorms?"

Hermione did a quick inspection of the person in front of her. Slightly wavy hair combed to the side, a serious look, blue eyes…did she see him somewhere before?

'Of course,' she thought with a mental chuckle, 'he's from Hogwarts…'

"I," she held herself from saying the truth with a quick save; that punk (probably Malfoy, she could feel it!) would hear from HER alone… "I…got lost. Please don't…report this, it is already quite embarrassing, really…" she looked away for the wanted effect.

"I hope you are kidding. What year are you in?" he demanded with a cold face.

'What? Why is he insisting? Something is wrong, and unless I don't figure it out in the upcoming-'

"Listen," she cut herself from thinking (trust Hermione to do that kind of thing). … Well?

"Riddle."

"Riddle?" she echoed with shock. Yes, the image associated. It was HIM. His neutral face was showing slight irritation. Her brows were furrowed and his jaw was clenched. By then he had lowered his wand. Hermione had too. In fact, it was lowered completely before she took off in an astonishing speed right past the boy. The latter obviously went after her, gaining on her more and more. Hermione had decided against attacking him, wise enough to know that he would crush her with dark magic. However, she should have also taken in consideration his athletic abilities!

Using her I.Q. of 600, she, yet again, stopped in her tracks. Due to the suddenness, Tom bumped into her and fell backwards with a muffled 'ouf!'. Awkward. VERY awkward.

'Oh Merlin,' Hermione thought with a dreadful expression, 'I just made the Dark Lord stumble like an idiot and perhaps even injured him!'

_Better safe than sorry, _as they say. So Hermione quickly helped him up, the same look plastered on her face. The young boy was honestly…confused.

"I don't get it−"

"Neither do I," she quickly said.

"What−?"

"What?" she repeated. A few silent moments passed. Finally deciding on what to do, the young Granger just let herself be dragged (roughly, but not too much) out of the forest and to the wanted destination: Hogwarts. See? It was really that simple! Not. She was with Tom Riddle, a.k.a., Lord Jr. Voldemort.

But why? The dark lord had been destroyed barely a week ago. The war was over and…there was no reason for her to see Tom Riddle. Was this a He-who-must-not-be-named's back-up plan? Or maybe that was just ridiculous…

'One step at a time,' she thought with a racing mind. Being escorted, the forest had a different feeling to it. It was…double the darkness, half the security and triple the scariness. Thanks, Tom! The steps he was taking, speaking of the one and only, were rather big and quick. After a mere five minutes, they were in the clearing. Hermione cleared her throat, but Tom neither stopped nor looked at her.

"Perhaps,"she tried again, "you could let go of my bluing wrist since, as you can see, I'm not escaping."

"Perhaps you are thicker than I thought." He icily said.

Her eyes became golf balls again.

"Excuse me?!" she asked/shouted while releasing her arm with a strong tug. He shouldn't have said that to Hermione.

He stared. His eyes burned her. She looked around in frustration. If this was the Dark Lord, then wouldn't shouting be a bad idea? But how could this be the Dark Lord? What kind of joke was this? Whoever it was, he was going to pay _dearly_.

"Malfoy?" she suddenly asked. "Is that you?" 'Of course it's not, but what can I say?'

"You are forcing me to use my spells."

Only thing was, it wasn't funny, and Draco was far, far away…

_**To be continued….**_

**A/N** Like? Dislike? Tell me what you think!


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